Billy Joe McGuffrey is the first song from Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie. The song is about a clumsy boy named Billy Joe McGuffrey, who physically injures himself in a bizarre way each school year from first grade to twelfth grade.
In the movie, Dad Asparagus and the kids performed a short version while on the way to a Twippo concert. In Jonah Sing-Along Songs and More!, Chris Rice performed a version where the following grades weren't sung: 4th, 5th, 7th and 11th. On the Jonah soundtrack, all 1st to 12th grade parts are sung. In Millward's Space Adventure the short version with the same audio is once again sung by Dad Asparagus as King Rondo and the kids when they help him with his concert with Millward doing the harmonica solo.
Lyrics[]
Movie Version and Millward's Space Adventure[]
Everyone: Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the first day of first grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He tripped over a pencil box, flew up in the air.
Landed on a kangaroo who pulled out all his hair.
He needed first aid in the first grade.
First aid in the first grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Oh Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the second day of second grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He slipped on a banana peel, flew up in the sky.
Landed on a chimpanzee who poked him in the eye.
He needed first aid in the second grade.
First aid in the second grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the third day of third grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He fell out of a fishing boat, splashed into the sea.
Landed on a moray eel who bit him on the knee.
He needed first aid in the third grade.
First aid in the third grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
(Short Harmonica Solo)
Mike Asparagus/King Rondo: 12th Grade!
Everyone: Now... Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the twelfth day of twelfth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He walked into financial aid, fell and broke a bone.
Showed them all his bills and got a great big college loan.
He needed first aid in the twelfth grade.
First aid in the twelfth grade (2x).
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
You could buy a zoo with all the Doctor bills he paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaid!
Jonah Sing-Along Songs and More Version[]
Man: Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the first day of first grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He tripped over a pencil box, flew up in the air.
Landed on a kangaroo who pulled out all his hair.
He needed first aid in the first grade.
First aid in the first grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the second day of second grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He slipped on a banana peel, flew up in the sky. Landed on a chimpanzee who poked him in the eye.
He needed first aid in the second grade.
First aid in the second grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the third day of third grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He fell out of a fishing boat, splashed into the sea.
Landed on a moray eel who bit him on the knee.
He needed first aid in the third grade.
First aid in the third grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the sixth day of sixth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He went out on a field trip, the first one of the year.
Backed into a sabertooth and pierced both of his ears.
He needed first aid in the sixth grade.
First aid in the sixth grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid
On the eighth day of eighth grade, I'll tell you what he did
He tried to play some basketball went up for a dunk.
Landed in the bushes and got squirted by a skunk.
He needed first aid in the eighth grade.
First aid in the eighth grade (x2)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the ninth day of ninth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He fed the pigs on grandpa's farm, two piglets and a sow.
Slipped on all their slop and then got stepped on by a cow
He needed first aid in the ninth grade.
First aid in the ninth grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the tenth day of tenth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He went out on some water skis and hit a sunken log.
Wiped out all the lily pads, got spit on by a frog
He needed first aid in the tenth grade.
First aid in the tenth grade (2x).
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now... Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the twelfth day of twelfth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He walked into financial aid, fell and broke a bone.
Showed them all his bills and got a great big college loan.
He needed first aid in the twelfth grade.
First aid in the twelfth grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid (3x)
Paid! (3x)
Full Version[]
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the first day of first grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He tripped over a pencil box, flew up in the air.
Landed on a kangaroo who pulled out all his hair.
He needed first aid in the first grade.
First aid in the first grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the second day of second grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He slipped on a banana peel, flew up in the sky. Landed on a chimpanzee who poked him in the eye.
He needed first aid in the second grade.
First aid in the second grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the third day of third grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He fell out of a fishing boat, splashed into the sea.
Landed on a moray eel who bit him on the knee.
He needed first aid in the third grade.
First aid in the third grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the fourth day of fourth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He went out on a tadpole hunt, slipped into the creek.
Landed on a large-mouth bass who bit him on the cheek.
He needed first aid in the fourth grade.
First aid in the fourth grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the fifth day of fifth grade, I'll tell you what he did
He went into the garden shop looking for a rose.
Sniffed a baby's breath and got a bee caught up his nose.
He needed first aid in the fifth grade.
First aid in the fifth grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the sixth day of sixth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He went out on a field trip, the first one of the year.
Backed into a sabertooth and pierced both of his ears.
He needed first aid in the sixth grade.
First aid in the sixth grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the seventh day of seventh grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He tried out for the talent show to show how well he sung.
Cracked a grin, a wasp flew in, and stung him on the tongue.
He needed first aid in the seventh grade.
First aid in the seventh grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid
On the eighth day of eighth grade, I'll tell you what he did
He tried to play some basketball went up for a dunk.
Landed in the bushes and got squirted by a skunk.
He needed first aid in the eighth grade.
First aid in the eighth grade (x2)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the ninth day of ninth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He fed the pigs on grandpa's farm, two piglets and a sow.
Slipped on all their slop and then got stepped on by a cow
He needed first aid in the ninth grade.
First aid in the ninth grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the tenth day of tenth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He went out on some water skis and hit a sunken log.
Wiped out all the lily pads, got spit on by a frog
He needed first aid in the tenth grade.
First aid in the tenth grade (2x).
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the eleventh day of eleventh grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He swerved and missed an alley cat while taking driver's ed.
Ran into a tree and bumped the dashboard with his head.
He needed first aid in the eleventh grade.
First aid in the eleventh grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid.
Now... Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.
On the twelfth day of twelfth grade, I'll tell you what he did.
He walked into financial aid, fell and broke a bone.
Showed them all his bills and got a great big college loan.
He needed first aid in the twelfth grade.
First aid in the twelfth grade (2x)
You could buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid (3x)
Paid! (3x)
Fun Facts[]
Trivia[]
- The song was shortened in two depictions:
- The film only did first, second, third, and twelfth grade. According to producer, Ameake Owens, this was done because it would've been too long to do all grades in the opening.
- The music video for Chris Rice's version, featured in Jonah Sing-Along Songs and More!, and as a bonus feature for the film's DVD release, removes the verses for grades 4, 5, 7, and 11. Despite this, the verse for fourth grade was still present in the trailer for Sing-Along Songs and More!. Similarly, the soundtrack promo for the film briefly showed seventh grade.
- Originally, the song was going to be about Jonah, but that changed because they didn't want to spoil the film for those who don't know the biblical story.